Everyone knows how to do “it,” but few people know the secrets to body-aching, soul-connecting, “I feel closer to you than ever” sex. What if sex wasn’t just doing it? What if sex was more satisfying physically AND emotionally? (Maybe it wouldn’t only be a Saturday night thing?) Here are 10 things EVERY married couple…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/FTF_NativeAd_Nov2021_10ThingsEveryCouple.jpg6281200John Daumhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngJohn Daum2020-07-09 20:49:202021-11-10 14:01:5510 Things Every Married Couple Needs to Know About Sex
I have good news and bad news if you disagree about parenting. First, the bad news. Marriage researcher, therapist, and author, Dr. John Gottman has found that there are several issues couples will NEVER 100% agree on. Parenting is one of them. One of you is probably all about tough love while the other is…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/serhat-beyazkaya-AHwlM2FocV4-unsplash-scaled.jpg40063205Reggie Madisonhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngReggie Madison2020-07-08 14:07:572020-10-20 13:08:27My Spouse and I Disagree About Parenting
If you have ever watched Everybody Loves Raymond, you know firsthand how overbearing in-laws like Ray’s mom can be. Giving her opinion when nobody asked for it, making off-handed comments about their parenting, criticizing decisions they make, and talking about them to each other was Marie’s style for sure. And, Raymond found it really hard…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/AdobeStock_204872376.jpeg13652048Julie Baumgardnerhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngJulie Baumgardner2020-07-08 14:04:072022-06-07 11:37:56HELP! My In-Laws Are Ruining My Marriage!
Are you feeling frustrated with your spouse? Do things just seem more intense between the two of you? Is working from home and/or taking care of the family making you tired? Are you worn out from keeping up with the household duties? Do you find that you and your spouse are arguing and disagreeing more?…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/woman-in-black-shirt-holding-white-ceramic-mug-4406756-scaled-e1596213657477.jpg187500Gena Ellishttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngGena Ellis2020-07-07 08:46:462020-10-20 13:09:47Did I Marry the Right Person?
Ahhhh, it finally happened. You and your spouse sat down to eat and… dead silence. In fact, this has happened a lot lately: while lying in bed, riding in the car, sitting on the couch, deciding what to do for fun. You realize that the two of you have absolutely nothing in common to talk…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/crop-unrecognizable-couple-holding-hands-while-sitting-on-4308158-scaled-e1596214014618.jpg281500Reggie Madisonhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngReggie Madison2020-07-02 16:34:482022-08-25 13:31:52Help! My Spouse and I Have Nothing in Common
Make your conversations more productive with these tips.
It’s nothing new to disagree with the ones you love, whether it’s about current events, religion, guns, racism, politics, football or something else. In fact, chances are pretty good that you completely disagree on certain topics with someone you care deeply about. The disagreements may be so intense you wonder how you can actually co-exist. …
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/disagree-priscilla-du-preez-ZxMASvRPEn4-unsplash-1-e1596214094110.jpg205500Julie Baumgardnerhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngJulie Baumgardner2020-07-01 06:07:272022-03-18 12:43:35What to Do When You Disagree With the Ones You Love
“I forgive you.” You desperately want to hear those words, but I want to explain to you why you might not hear those words right away and why you don’t necessarily need to hear those words right away. And that’s totally okay. ☆ What you need right now is to begin understanding forgiveness itself, especially…
We expect things to be different after marriage, and one of the more difficult changes is in our friendships, and especially our opposite-sex friends. Often, while we share similar stages of life with our friends, your marital relationship should be the primary relationship. It’s pretty likely that you and your spouse want what is in…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/three-persons-sitting-on-the-stairs-talking-with-each-other-1438072-scaled-e1596214383483.jpg244500Gena Ellishttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngGena Ellis2020-06-29 08:49:062021-10-28 10:55:10I Don’t Like That My Spouse Has Opposite-Sex Friends
I know how you feel. I get a really big, life-goal idea in my mind about every two weeks. And when I drop my best-laid plans on my wife as if it’s a slam-dunk, somehow she just doesn’t see it the way I do. And that’s when things can blow up. Let me suggest some…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/nani-chavez-EKHB_4kEYzw-unsplash-scaled-e1596214468911.jpg282500Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-06-29 08:44:022022-08-23 09:54:55What to Do When Your Spouse Isn’t Supportive
The "magic number" may rise or fall in different seasons.
What if I told you that there was a number—a magical number—that defined the exact rate you and your spouse should have sex each and every week so both of you experience wonderful, marital, sensuous bliss that will last over the entire span of your marriage, “until death do you part?” Well, do I have…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/FTF_NativeAd_Nov2021_HowOften.jpg6281200Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-06-26 08:21:402021-11-22 15:37:43How Often Should We Have Sex?
It's a big deal for you and your spouse to be on the same page.
As a young girl, I grew up in a neighborhood that was primarily boys. So, I played football, kickball, basketball and baseball with the guys. Throughout high school and college, I always felt comfortable around guys. They were like big brothers to me. I remember one incident when I was going on a date in…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/people-holding-mugs-1524335-scaled-e1596214792211.jpg200500Gena Ellishttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngGena Ellis2020-06-23 14:46:312021-11-23 09:39:00How Opposite-Sex Friendships Change After You Get Married
Have you ever compared your marriage to someone else’s and wondered if your marriage was in trouble? Or, you come home from work and things are pleasant enough between the two of you, but you just don’t seem to have that connection you used to have? Maybe the laughter doesn’t come as easily. Or perhaps…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/AdobeStock_298246426-scaled-e1596214934815.jpeg217500Julie Baumgardnerhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngJulie Baumgardner2020-06-22 09:53:512020-07-31 13:02:39Is My Marriage in Trouble?
What if you could do just three things that would revamp, recharge, and revitalize your marriage? Just three things. Your marriage is worth that! When I was a kid, I had this toy car that resembled the black-and-red van from the iconic television show, The A-Team. (For you younger generations, you can ask Siri or…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/shawnee-d-Qx-jCqiTezY-unsplash-scaled-e1596215082423.jpg272500Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-06-22 09:38:302022-03-04 13:34:02The 3 Most Important Things You Should Do for Your Spouse
These insights can help you understand what may be going on.
If your spouse wants sex more than you do, here are a few words of wisdom. I probably drive a little faster than my wife is sometimes comfortable with (and she’s not afraid to let me know). On the other hand, she is more cautious on the road (and I don’t dare say anything from…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/becca-tapert-F0ZiHWliGGM-unsplash-1.jpg13652048Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-06-16 17:15:382022-06-30 07:30:23My Spouse Wants Sex More Than I Do
How do you know how strong and healthy your marriage is? Doctors help us to know whether our bodies are strong and healthy. I love getting a good report from the doctor after a check-up: Mr. Ownby, your lab work shows your cholesterol is at a very healthy level. Mr. Ownby, your heart rate is…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/jakob-owens-lA7MqUn802U-unsplash.jpg20481365Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-06-03 11:16:212020-10-20 13:13:414 Signs Your Marriage Is Healthy
Relationships are key to understanding and lasting change.
Sam Collier didn’t have his first white friend until he was 21 years old. “It wasn’t until I had this friend that I realized how different our worlds were. He didn’t understand my world and I didn’t really understand his,” says Collier. It might be helpful to know that Sam is one of five children.…
We had been married for about a year and I was really frustrated. My husband owned his own business and to me, it felt like it was the mistress in our marriage. He worked long hours which meant I spent a lot of time by myself. It wasn’t that I didn’t have friends I could…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/kimi-albertson-nTOHlmml4wY-unsplash.jpg13652048Julie Baumgardnerhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngJulie Baumgardner2020-06-02 08:38:542022-06-10 11:36:42What Do You Do When You Know Your Marriage Needs Help?
For me, it often happens in the evening (though not always). It feels like a sudden Visitor at your door who comes in unannounced and spreads an uncomfortable, heavy, warm, wet blanket over you, gradually but quickly covering your whole body, and I feel it mainly in my chest. As soon as I feel myself…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/man-kissing-left-cheek-of-smiling-woman-1667847-2.jpg13652048Chris Ownbyhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngChris Ownby2020-05-29 07:45:492022-05-19 11:15:25How To Help Your Spouse Deal With Anxiety
Doing these things as a couple can make it a little easier.
No matter how you slice it, the birth of a child brings about changes that can be challenging. Here are some of the reasons why marriage can be harder after having a baby and how those challenges can make your marriage stronger. Unspoken Expectations. You probably have a picture in your mind of what your…
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/mother-kissing-her-daughter-3662849.jpg20481365Reggie Madisonhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngReggie Madison2020-05-29 07:38:252022-04-14 09:54:095 Reasons Why Marriage Can Be Harder After Having A Baby
There’s a lot that happens when a couple has their first baby… Sleepless nights. Endless, life-impacting decisions. The world being turned upside down. Re-creating a “new normal.” A constant fear of things going wrong. The steep learning curve for both parents. The list could go on, and on, and on. And I’ve heard it all……
https://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/photo-of-people-looking-on-child-3617872.jpg12382048Caroline Henryhttps://firstthings.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ftf-logo-300x186.pngCaroline Henry2020-05-26 16:18:402021-03-30 09:48:0810 Questions Couples Should Ask Each Other Before Having a Baby
10 Things Every Married Couple Needs to Know About Sex
Everyone knows how to do “it,” but few people know the secrets to body-aching, soul-connecting, “I feel closer to you than ever” sex. What if sex wasn’t just doing it? What if sex was more satisfying physically AND emotionally? (Maybe it wouldn’t only be a Saturday night thing?) Here are 10 things EVERY married couple…
My Spouse and I Disagree About Parenting
I have good news and bad news if you disagree about parenting. First, the bad news. Marriage researcher, therapist, and author, Dr. John Gottman has found that there are several issues couples will NEVER 100% agree on. Parenting is one of them. One of you is probably all about tough love while the other is…
HELP! My In-Laws Are Ruining My Marriage!
If you have ever watched Everybody Loves Raymond, you know firsthand how overbearing in-laws like Ray’s mom can be. Giving her opinion when nobody asked for it, making off-handed comments about their parenting, criticizing decisions they make, and talking about them to each other was Marie’s style for sure. And, Raymond found it really hard…
Did I Marry the Right Person?
Are you feeling frustrated with your spouse? Do things just seem more intense between the two of you? Is working from home and/or taking care of the family making you tired? Are you worn out from keeping up with the household duties? Do you find that you and your spouse are arguing and disagreeing more?…
Help! My Spouse and I Have Nothing in Common
Ahhhh, it finally happened. You and your spouse sat down to eat and… dead silence. In fact, this has happened a lot lately: while lying in bed, riding in the car, sitting on the couch, deciding what to do for fun. You realize that the two of you have absolutely nothing in common to talk…
What to Do When You Disagree With the Ones You Love
It’s nothing new to disagree with the ones you love, whether it’s about current events, religion, guns, racism, politics, football or something else. In fact, chances are pretty good that you completely disagree on certain topics with someone you care deeply about. The disagreements may be so intense you wonder how you can actually co-exist. …
Will My Spouse Ever Forgive Me?
“I forgive you.” You desperately want to hear those words, but I want to explain to you why you might not hear those words right away and why you don’t necessarily need to hear those words right away. And that’s totally okay. ☆ What you need right now is to begin understanding forgiveness itself, especially…
I Don’t Like That My Spouse Has Opposite-Sex Friends
We expect things to be different after marriage, and one of the more difficult changes is in our friendships, and especially our opposite-sex friends. Often, while we share similar stages of life with our friends, your marital relationship should be the primary relationship. It’s pretty likely that you and your spouse want what is in…
What to Do When Your Spouse Isn’t Supportive
I know how you feel. I get a really big, life-goal idea in my mind about every two weeks. And when I drop my best-laid plans on my wife as if it’s a slam-dunk, somehow she just doesn’t see it the way I do. And that’s when things can blow up. Let me suggest some…
How Often Should We Have Sex?
What if I told you that there was a number—a magical number—that defined the exact rate you and your spouse should have sex each and every week so both of you experience wonderful, marital, sensuous bliss that will last over the entire span of your marriage, “until death do you part?” Well, do I have…
How Opposite-Sex Friendships Change After You Get Married
As a young girl, I grew up in a neighborhood that was primarily boys. So, I played football, kickball, basketball and baseball with the guys. Throughout high school and college, I always felt comfortable around guys. They were like big brothers to me. I remember one incident when I was going on a date in…
Is My Marriage in Trouble?
Have you ever compared your marriage to someone else’s and wondered if your marriage was in trouble? Or, you come home from work and things are pleasant enough between the two of you, but you just don’t seem to have that connection you used to have? Maybe the laughter doesn’t come as easily. Or perhaps…
The 3 Most Important Things You Should Do for Your Spouse
What if you could do just three things that would revamp, recharge, and revitalize your marriage? Just three things. Your marriage is worth that! When I was a kid, I had this toy car that resembled the black-and-red van from the iconic television show, The A-Team. (For you younger generations, you can ask Siri or…
My Spouse Wants Sex More Than I Do
If your spouse wants sex more than you do, here are a few words of wisdom. I probably drive a little faster than my wife is sometimes comfortable with (and she’s not afraid to let me know). On the other hand, she is more cautious on the road (and I don’t dare say anything from…
4 Signs Your Marriage Is Healthy
How do you know how strong and healthy your marriage is? Doctors help us to know whether our bodies are strong and healthy. I love getting a good report from the doctor after a check-up: Mr. Ownby, your lab work shows your cholesterol is at a very healthy level. Mr. Ownby, your heart rate is…
How Relationships Can Transform Race Relations
Sam Collier didn’t have his first white friend until he was 21 years old. “It wasn’t until I had this friend that I realized how different our worlds were. He didn’t understand my world and I didn’t really understand his,” says Collier. It might be helpful to know that Sam is one of five children.…
What Do You Do When You Know Your Marriage Needs Help?
We had been married for about a year and I was really frustrated. My husband owned his own business and to me, it felt like it was the mistress in our marriage. He worked long hours which meant I spent a lot of time by myself. It wasn’t that I didn’t have friends I could…
How To Help Your Spouse Deal With Anxiety
For me, it often happens in the evening (though not always). It feels like a sudden Visitor at your door who comes in unannounced and spreads an uncomfortable, heavy, warm, wet blanket over you, gradually but quickly covering your whole body, and I feel it mainly in my chest. As soon as I feel myself…
5 Reasons Why Marriage Can Be Harder After Having A Baby
No matter how you slice it, the birth of a child brings about changes that can be challenging. Here are some of the reasons why marriage can be harder after having a baby and how those challenges can make your marriage stronger. Unspoken Expectations. You probably have a picture in your mind of what your…
10 Questions Couples Should Ask Each Other Before Having a Baby
There’s a lot that happens when a couple has their first baby… Sleepless nights. Endless, life-impacting decisions. The world being turned upside down. Re-creating a “new normal.” A constant fear of things going wrong. The steep learning curve for both parents. The list could go on, and on, and on. And I’ve heard it all……
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