Here's what some couples say are major issues to deal with in marriage, according to a Life Innovations survey of 21,501 married couples from every state.
- Problems sharing leadership
- One partner is too stubborn
- Stress created by child-rearing differences
- One partner is too negative or critical
- One partner wishes the other had more time
- One partner wishes the other was more willing to share their feelings
- Feeling responsible for issues
- Avoiding conflict with partner
- Difficulty completing tasks
- Differences never get resolved
Building a healthy marriage means that you have learned to turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones. Build on your strengths and find ways to creatively address your differences. Conflict management/resolution skills are crucial.
In strong marriages, both partners say:
their partner understands their positions,
they feel free to share their feelings and ideas,
they take disagreements seriously, and
they work cooperatively to resolve conflicts.
The happiest couples said they were satisfied with the way they communicate, find it easy to express their feelings and find their partner to be a good listener. They note that their partner doesn’t use put-downs.