September 24, 2021
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10 ways to create comfort in your life
It’s not normal to experience the amount of stress, anxiety, and uncertainty most of us have felt this year. And it’s been challenging for many to find any relief or comfort, yet we desperately need it. Many folks are great at creating comforting moments for others, but when it comes to being intentional about creating comfort in their world, well, not so much.
You can be intentional, even in times of extreme stress, about building soothing moments into your day that allow you to escape. If you’re thinking you just can’t afford to do that, here’s hoping you will reconsider. You really can’t afford not to. We all need moments that allow for a break in the action to hit the refresh button. It’s good for us, and it’s good for the people around us.
Ways to create some comfort in your life:
Make a list of all the things you love that make you happy.
Do some of those things daily.
Indulge in your favorite comfort meal.
You know, all the stuff you would typically say, “I shouldn’t be eating this…” Eat that and savor every second of it guilt-free.
Take time out for a walk.
Make a point of looking up at the sky, watching the trees, and looking for wildlife. Pay attention to your breathing. Avoid thinking about things that are stressful in your life at the moment. Literally, take a break.
Watch a funny show or talk to that friend who always makes you laugh.
Listen to soothing music, read a book or magazine, work on a puzzle, or on your hobby.
Doing something that distracts you from the day’s stress and anxiety can be relaxing and bring comfort.
how to build empathy in marriage
Have you ever whipped up your favorite batch of homemade cookies to find out in the first bite that you left out that one key ingredient that makes all the difference? Empathy is that key ingredient to a great recipe for a healthy marriage that you don’t want to forget.
A large body of research tells us the practice of empathy is essential to a thriving, happy, healthy marriage. However, many people reduce the idea of empathy to it being just “touchy-feely” or something that some people are born having, but others not so much.
Here are some steps for couples to take to building empathy:
Not to judge. Not to fix. And not even to retort. Listen simply to grasp what your spouse is feeling with as much accuracy as possible.
You may listen and think, Gee, I’d never get so riled up (or excited, or sad) over this. Avoid judging your spouse’s feelings based on how you would respond in the same situation. Instead, acknowledge to yourself that these are their feelings (and not yours).
Namely, your spouse’s emotional response. This may take some conscious effort on your part, especially if they are emotionally responsive to a situation in a way you wouldn’t. Truly put yourself in their shoes.
Take what you’ve come to understand from the previous steps and respond in compassion.
☑️ Practice vulnerability.
Empathy is best built when both people in the marriage open up about situations, feelings, and thoughts they simply want the other to better understand.
Empathy is an all-important ingredient for a healthy marriage, but building it takes time.
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from Margo Mathis, wife to her husband of 2 years, Jebediah, dog momma to Maggie, and the Marketing Assistant here at First Things First. Take a peek at her recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out 👀:
✨Enneagram Test I absolutely LOVE the enneagram test. It helps you better understand yourself, what triggers you, and how you react to certain dynamics and emotions. Knowing my enneagram has helped me grow and appreciate certain qualities in myself. In case you’re wondering, I’m a type 2, where my fellow 2s at?🤗
🎧 SHE Podcast by Jordan Dooley is definitely for my ladies out there. (Although you fellas might be inspired too!) This podcast is packed full of personal development that is sure to spark a fire in you! I enjoy popping my headphones in and taking a nice walk while I listen.
📲 Rain App is amazing and FREE! My husband and I don’t go a night without falling asleep with the help of this app; it drowns out all other noise. You can choose from tons of sounds or mix and match your own soothing tune.
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Know a friend who would love reading all the relationship goodness we’ve packed in here? Go ahead and share it with them!