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10 tips to help blended families
Remarrying with children often creates a complex dynamic. Expectations may not be clear and people aren’t sure how to behave. Ex-spouses and their new spouse impact what happens in your household. Is it any surprise that all of this creates stress and conflict in relationships?
Believe it or not, transitioning into a stepfamily requires some prep work.
If you are embarking on this journey, Ron Deal’s recommendations can help you out.
- Nurture your marriage and learn to communicate well.
According to a study of more than 50,000 stepfamily couples, maintaining fun in marriage is the number five predictor of a high-quality stepcouple relationship. Good communication and conflict resolution skills were the number two and three predictors of successful remarriages.
- Keep perspective.
This is new for everyone, so expect to feel lost. Seek understanding and don’t force people to blend, because it takes time. It may even take years for your family to really unite, but it’s better than causing a lot of frustration by moving too quickly. Be patient with the process and have a “slow-cooker” mentality.
- Talk with others.
Before you begin, you might want to educate yourself about stepfamily living. Also, ask other stepfamilies about their experiences and the things that caught them by surprise. Find out how they handled the early days.
keep your cool & yell less
Have you ever felt like you’ve cared so much you just can’t anymore? Like you’re exhausted from taking care of others? Even if you’ve never heard of compassion fatigue, you may be familiar with what it is. Maybe more familiar than you’d like.
Compassion fatigue is rooted in caring for others.
It would be easy to confuse compassion fatigue with burnout, but they’re a bit different.
Compassion fatigue occurs because of the emotional strain of supporting those who are suffering from something traumatic. It is rooted in caring for others. It’s not just a workplace thing, but it can co-exist with burnout, especially for those in service professions.
Look for these symptoms:
- Physical and psychological exhaustion
- Feeling helpless, hopeless, or powerless
- A decreased sense of personal and professional accomplishment
- A change in your worldview or spirituality
- Drastic shifts in mood
- A dramatic withdrawal from social connections
Since compassion fatigue affects your mental and physical health, it also impacts the quality of your relationships with your partner, children, friends, and co-workers.