January 07, 2022
top trending topics
💪 Strengthen the relationships in your life with a little gratitude.
✅ Setting realistic expectations for your marriage makes all the difference.
🤗 Create some good habits in your marriage this new year.
🔀 It’s normal for your relationship dynamic to change after you get married.
😔 Moving past an emotional affair isn’t always easy, but it’s possible.
tips & tricks for growth
handle disappointment from your spouse with ease
Disappointment in your spouse can spark uncertainty and shake your trust. It might even make you wonder if you can relyon them at all.
First, let me just say: You’re not alone, and every married person disappoints their spouse at some point. Your feelings are honest, legit, and okay. And even though disappointment is common in marriage, knowing that doesn’t really make things easier. So let’s talk about it.
Here are some things to consider:
📍Unmet expectations breed disappointment.
What do you expect from your spouse? How do your expectations connect to your overall relationship goals?
📍Disappointment comes in different flavors.
What exactly did your spouse do or not do that disappointed you?
Is the disappointment in something specific or general? Issues that are minor or major?
📍You are coping with your disappointment in one way or another.
How are you coping or responding right now? Would you say your responses are healthy or unhealthy?
📍Be careful about what your disappointment might lead you to assume.
Why might your spouse have acted (or failed to act) the way they did that led to your disappointment?
What do you do, then, when your spouse disappoints you? How do you handle it? 👇👇👇
you can be an emotionally safe space for your spouse
You want to be your spouse’s hero? Their most trusted confidant? The one who supports them and helps them flourish? The one they share their wildest, most audacious dreams with?
None of it happens if you aren’t the emotionally safe person your spouse needs. With you, they feel safe to be transparent, vulnerable, authentic, flawed, and emotional. They’re free to be themselves.
Side note: Just because you’re emotionally safe doesn’t mean they will always feel safe. Your spouse may have their own barriers to work through. You can’t control that. But the safer you are, the more space and freedom your partner will have to clearly see themselves and even grow through their experiences.
Here’s a few ways you can be the partner they need:
💛 Be secure within yourself.
💛 Show genuine curiosity about your spouse.
💛 Express honesty with humility.
💛 Ask, “What makes you feel emotionally safe with me?”
💛 Communicate with gentleness and gratitude.
💛 Be Inviting.
You can set your spouse free to be themselves with you.
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from James Woods, Fiancé to Marquita, Dad of 6, and the Community Outreach Specialist here at First Things First. Take a peek at his recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out 👀:
🎧 One Extraordinary Marriage Podcast– I like it because it does a great job teaching you about married life. It makes intimate conversations a little easier to talk about for us.
✅ How We Love Quiz– We took this quiz as a couple just for kicks and found out how amazing it is that opposites can attract. If you want a different look at love and how it works in your relationship, check it out for yourself!
😘 Date night idea: Just Chill– One of the things my fiancée and I are working on is truly enjoying each other’s company. This is a great date night idea- I promise you won’t be disappointed.
share the love
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