February 17, 2023
top trending topics
💔 If your child’s marriage is failing, help them navigate this time.
📳 Dads, if your teenage daughter has gone radio silent– Here are a few reasons!
💞 Kindness is learned, mirror it for your child.
💻 Managing screen time & schoolwork doesn’t have to be a headache.
✨ Raise more independent kids with the self-determination theory.
tips & tricks for growth
let your child find failure
The idea that my babies would feel even an ounce of pain or disappointment that I could not prevent was unfathomable to me.
🐻That’s when the Mama Bear persona took over: I’m going to protect my children from everything that can harm them, and letting them fail is not an option. I was diligent with child-proofing and safety concerns.
So, I put covers in the outlets. I gave away furniture that had sharp edges and never left them alone in the tub or in their high chair. I had gates and locks on cabinets, door handles, and even the toilet seat (sometimes to my detriment.) It was my responsibility to keep them safe!
It was a long time before I knew that I was taking every responsibility onto myself. I had the pleasure of meeting Hal Runkel, a marriage and family therapist, and 👉 the words that he shared changed this Mama Bear’s life. He said, “You are responsible to your children, not for them.”
Are you in Mama Bear Mode? Are you keeping your child safe, or keeping your child from developing personal responsibility and being prepared for their future?
🚨 Letting your child fail may be one of the best things you can do for them.
hard to hear, but it might actually be you
So you’re probably reading this because you have had issues in multiple relationships with your spouse, friends, family, and work… Let’s be real: those issues affect us all, but they can be frustrating and downright hard.
Personally, you may be wondering some things like:
- Why do friends and family keep ghosting me?
- Why can’t I seem to get along with anyone at my job?
- How do I get others to see that my way actually works better than theirs most of the time?
- Do I want to have all the control in my relationships?
There’s no easy way to say this, and it may be a painful thing to even think about, but…
The answer may be that your relationship issues are a “YOU” problem.
Self-examination is not always easy, and it rarely feels good, but it’s so worth it! With that in mind, here are 4 reasons which might signal that relationship issues are a “you” problem.
let’s get REALatable
It’s time to take things a step further & get a little intimate with a Q&A. What do you say?😉 Learn a little bit about the faces behind all of this relationship gold. This week we’re chatting with Chris Ownby, husband of 18 years to wife Kristen, #Girldad to two teenagers, outdoor enthusiast, and the Research Strategist here at First Things First. Let’s get REALatable💛 & learn a little bit about him:
Q: Most overrated dessert?
A: 🍮 Ok, probably an unpopular opinion: Flan. Hands down. I mean, what even is it? Pudding in the shape of a hockey puck? What flavor is flan? Is it mere coincidence that flan is one letter off from rhyming with bland? I mean, it might be better if you put chocolate syrup on it. Or caramel. Or M&M’s. Maybe…
Q: Biggest Pet Peeve?
A: 😡 Besides flan? Hmmm… So many to choose from, but at the moment I’m going to say shoppers with shopping carts at Walmart. They DO NOT follow the rules of the road. At all. When I am voted into office, my first act will be to establish lanes, red lights, turn signals on the buggies, and the like along the aisles. Maybe even a Walmart traffic cop to keep people on the up and up. “How’d you get a ticket, dear?” “Oh, I ran a stop sign in the produce section.” Justice.
Q: Do you like taking naps?
A: 😴Uh, yeah. I’m a firm believer that there is not a wrong time to take a nap. Just had breakfast and feeling a little drowsy? Boom: nap. On the couch watching a boring round of Jeopardy before bedtime? Nap it out. Never a wrong time. Never.
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