July 08, 2022
top trending topics
tips & tricks for growth
tips for distancing from your in-laws
When you and your spouse said, “I do,” you united your families as well. Learning the rules of engagement for each family requires time, effort, and patience. You may have heard the old saying: “Good fences make good neighbors.” That saying also applies to families. When you have healthy boundaries, it can prevent in-laws from being outlaws.
Here are some things to keep in mind:
1. Understand that their family dynamics or interactions are different from yours.
2. Be willing to create a relationship with the in-laws.
3. Their behavior probably comes from a place of care.
4. Living away from them can provide natural boundaries.
5. You and your spouse are a FAMILY.
manage the conflict with ease
Parents teach their kids to stop, look and listen before crossing the street. But believe it or not, this is a really useful skill for managing conflict.
🖐️ Stop. Before launching into a lecture or hissy fit, consider these things. Ask yourself if what you are about to say or do will be helpful to your relationship. What is your current state of mind – are you stressed, tired or hungry? These things can impact how intensely you feel about something at any given moment.
👀 Look. First, look at your spouse and remember you are on the same team, not rivals. Then, examine the situation at hand and ask yourself if this is truly a big deal or really a matter of different preferences. Whether it is folding towels, loading the dishwasher or the current condition of your car’s interior, some things boil down to personal preference. Is pursuing a conversation about these things worth the cost? And, in looking at the big picture of living life together, will you choose to place your focus on these areas?
👂Listen. Instead of assuming your spouse couldn’t possibly have a reasonable explanation for why they do something a certain way, seek to understand their perspective before telling them why your way makes the most sense. It could help you avoid a lot of unnecessary drama. Even when you truly believe you are right, is it really necessary to prove it?
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from James Woods, Husband to Marquita, Dad of 6, and the Community Outreach Specialist here at First Things First. Take a peek at his recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out 👀:
📖 I was a lil scared to dive into 201 Relationship Questions: The Couple’s Guide to Building Trust and Emotional Intimacy, but once I opened this book, I was eager to share it with my wife and see what conversations we would open up in a positive direction.
💪 EXTREME COUPLES WORKOUT! *Expectations vs Reality* is a great thing to help motivate me and my wife starting out our new health plan. And what better way to work out than from the comfort of your own home?
😍 Now this is my favorite! Couples Massage Courses are very helpful when you want romance and to relieve some stress without breaking the bank for a massage.
share the love
Know a friend who would love reading all the relationship goodness we’ve packed in here? Go ahead and share it with them!