August 13, 2021
top trending topics
tips & tricks for growth
how to communicate better with your spouse
What would the world be like without good communication?
Airports would be a complete wreck (figuratively and literally).
Kids couldn’t learn reading, writing, ’rithmetic, and computer coding.
The barista at Starbucks would write a completely different name on my cup for my order. (Okay, well, that happens anyway.)
Not to mention… marriage would be chaotic!
Fortunately, communication in marriage isn’t some tricky thing that some people have, and some don’t. It’s a skill that you, me, and everyone else can practice and improve.
Here are six of the most crucial skills you can use to communicate better with your spouse:
1. Practice the art of listening well.
Listening well means seeking to understand. It’s putting yourself in your spouse’s shoes.
2. Ask lots of questions.
The ultimate goal of healthy communication in marriage is to connect. Be curious for the sake of knowing your husband or wife better and how you can strengthen your relationship.
3. Go deeper in your communication.
Communication can be shallow: My day was good. How was yours? I’m kinda tired. Tomorrow is Friday… But marriage can’t thrive in the shallow end of the pool; it has to take deeper dives.
4. Practice vulnerability.
Being vulnerable means showing more of who you are. Which means opening yourself up. And that takes trust, which is vital for a healthy marriage.
5. Practice often.
Schedule times to talk and connect with each other on deeper levels, even if it’s for just a few minutes. The average couple communicates for only 20 minutes a week; choose not to be average.
6. Learn to work through conflict well.
Disagreements are gonna happen. That’s part of marriage. But how you communicate through disagreements makes all the difference.
These six skills can transform your relationship.
7 questions to improve your marriage’s sex life
by Chris Ownby, the “sexpert”
I love talking about sex. No, not in a pervy way. Let me explain: I think more problems happen when sex is not discussed than when it is, especiallyamong married couples. Get this: even nerdy science says couples who talk about sex have much healthier… and dare I say, steamier… sex lives than those who don’t! Kind of makes you want to cue up the conversations!
But just what exactly should you talk about? Uhhh… honey, I like sex… do you like sex?… Ok, cool…
No, no, not like that! There are a gazillion great questions to help couples discuss sex. Questions about likes & dislikes, turn-ons & turn-offs, mood-makers & mood-killers. So, because I love talking about sex, and because I want you to love talking about sex…
Here are some questions every couple should ask to improve their Sex Life:
1. What makes sex fun for you?
2. What do you consider be-foreplay?
3. What is off the table? (And what’s on the table… if you know what I mean…)
4. How does stress affect sex for you?
5. We have different interest levels in sex. How do we meet in the middle with that?
6. What makes me insecure about sex?
7. How has sex changed in our marriage over time?
Q: Which country consumes the most chocolate per capita?
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from Tamara Slocum, our Creative Strategist. She’s been married to her college sweetheart, Bobby, since 2012 and together they have 3 amazing girls (5 yrs old and under!) Whew. 😅 She’s got her hands full and still took the time to give her recommendations because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out:
🤍 How We Love Quiz is an eye-opening online quiz to help determine your unique Love Style. There are 5 unique Love Styles that take into account how our childhood experiences formed the roots of who we are and continue to inform the way we respond to others and express love especially in our marriage. The best part? IT’S FREE.
📗 Fair Play by Eve Rodsky is a game-changer. Literally. It changes the game of divvying up domestic responsibilities in your marriage. The Fair Play Game is a time-and anxiety-saving system that offers a completely new way to rebalance your home life and reignite your relationship! 10 out of 10!!
🤑 Have you heard about Acorns? It’s my favorite money app. (Even Ashton Kutcher and Jennifer Lopez support it so you KNOW it’s legit.) Acorns makes it super easy to invest your money and save up for retirement in a Roth IRA. Plus they give back by planting oak trees, so clever and amazing for the environment!
share the love
Know a friend who would love reading all the relationship goodness we’ve packed in here? Go ahead and share it with them!
(Okay, we’re definitely moving there. Where are our chocolate lovers at???👋)