March 24, 2023
top trending topics
🌩️ Failed resolutions may be more detrimental than your think– Could your relationship be affected?
🔀 It’s normal for your relationship dynamic to change after you get married.
😞 If your fiancé has become a bit boring, here’s what you can do.
👥 Ask yourself these questions before sharing your relationship problems with others.
💭 Read this for a glimpse at what other people are thinking about married life.
tips & tricks for growth
get on the same page
Social media has so many positives. It allows you to stay in touch with people you might not otherwise see or hear from. But, just like everything else, social media also has potential potholes. Social media can have a real negative impact on your future marriage.
Whatever you post on social media, you’re inviting the world to see and pass judgment on via comments, likes, shares, etc. Without some understanding and agreement about what social media engagement looks like for you as a couple, this can be an ongoing area of conflict for any couple.
👉 The question for most couples is: How do you get to a place where you mutually agree?
Decide What Works for You as a Couple–
It’s helpful to start out talking about what really matters. The ultimate goal would be for those who like to be on social media to be out there, but not at the expense of their relationship. So, it’s helpful to think through what respect in marriage looks like when it comes to posting on social media. Have a conversation about what kind of boundaries you want to have with posts on social media.
trust em or not…
Oddly enough, you are going to have to trust me on this. You don’t know me. At the end of this, you are going to have to decide if this is trustworthy advice from a trustworthy source.
This is probably a good place for a disclaimer or three:
🛡️ Trust is a two-way street. Sometimes we withhold trust from people that are trustworthy. We may have gotten burned by someone close to us. We may be having trust issues because the world has gotten crazy and we are anxious and stressed out and feel overwhelmed by the constant bombardment of opinions and information. Or, we may have trust issues to work through on our end for a variety of totally legitimate reasons. Make sure you are doing the work on your end.
🛡️ Trust exists on a sliding scale. Trust is less like a light switch and more like a thermostat—we can turn it up as we develop trust with someone or turn it down if we see someone showing signs of not being trustworthy. Sometimes we don’t have enough history with someone to really decide if they are trustworthy and we have to go with a gut feeling about them. Only you know the track record of your “gut feelings.”
🛡️ Trust can be regained. We have all violated someone’s trust at some point. I know I have. I’ve been grateful that they didn’t write me off as “untrustworthy” forever and ever but gave me opportunities to regain their trust. Sometimes it has taken a period of time and understandably so. Leave others the room you want to be human and make mistakes. That said, there are pathologically untrustworthy people. Note it and act accordingly.
Trust is the bedrock of our relationships, but trust is also a fragile thing. Whether it is a spouse, our child, a member of our extended family, a neighbor, a co-worker, a friend posting on social media, or even the news—we need to know how much of our trust to invest and we want to be confident that our investment is safe.
let’s get REALatable
It’s time to take things a step further & get a little intimate with a Q&A. What do you say?😉 Learn a little bit about the faces behind all of this relationship gold. This week we’re chatting with Tamara Slocum, wife to her college sweetheart– Bobby, Mama to 3 girlies… (Her hands & heart stay full!), avid bookworm, and the Creative Strategist here at First Things First! Let’s get REALatable💛 & learn a little bit about her:
Q: Favorite place you’ve traveled?
A: 🗻 Salzburg, Austria! I loved visiting the trick fountains at Wasserspiele Hellbrunn and the Mirabell Palace Gardens (where they filmed some scenes from The Sound of Music)
Q: The thing that gets you in the most trouble?
A: 📚 Buying new books before I’ve finished what I’m currently reading… only to add it to my ever-growing ‘To Be Read’ list.
Q: Hot or cold drinks?
A: ☕️ Hot drinks! Vanilla Chai Tea Latte, Hot Apple Cider, Hot Chocolate… all my favs.
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