June 10, 2022
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knowing this ahead of time can lead to a happier marriage
Most couples anticipate having a long, happy marriage. And they should! But if you’ve been married any amount of time, you probably recognize it’s not always smooth sailing. Your marriage is going to get rocked by waves. Sure, there will be times when the sun is shining and the seas are calm. Just know before you get married, there will be storms ahead. But you can navigate the storms and make it through.
Here are 6 things to know before you get married:
1. Being in love is not an adequate foundation for building a successful marriage.
2. Romantic love has two stages.
3. The saying, “like mother, like daughter” and “like father, like son” is not a myth.
4. How to solve disagreements without arguing.
5. Apologizing is a sign of strength.
6. Mutual sexual fulfillment is not automatic.
establish trust in your future marriage from the start
What’s the difference between a loving, warm marriage and one full of friction and conflict? Trust. There are probably many items on your checklist for having a strong future marriage. If there’s one that ought to be at the top of the list, it’s trust.
So, how can you establish trust in your relationship?
1. Trust is built over time.
Trust is built through moments that confirm for your fiancé that you are who they think you are. How you respond when someone speaks negatively about your relationship or how you care for each other during a difficult time will either confirm or cause questions about who you are.
2. History matters.
You want your fiancé to have a fair opportunity to be trusted and not be the victim of your past experiences with other people. However, it’s important to be aware that your past is not to be forgotten but to be used as a learning experience. Talking through your ability to trust helps you develop clear expectations.
3. Believe your partner’s actions.
There’s a saying, “When a person shows you who they are, believe them.” When dating, it’s easy to create a mental image of what you think your future spouse will be like once you’re married. This can cause you to ignore the behaviors that give a more accurate picture of each other.
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from Caroline Henry, wife to her husband of 3 years, Will, new momma to a little girl, and the Content Strategist here at First Things First. Take a peek at her recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out 👀:
💬 Text your fiancé right now and ask, “If you were a crayon, what color would you be?” Then continue the conversation with this list of questions next time you’re together!
📲 Have you and your fiancé talked about how to manage household chores? The Maple App is an easy list-maker designed for busy couples to share tasks better – and strengthen your relationship along the way.
💤 Phones can be a huge barrier when it comes to connecting well, especially in a new marriage. If you’re up for the challenge, decide on a “phone bedtime” to implement after you get married! Both phones get put away at this time, then be sure to turn your focus to your soon-to-be spouse!
share the love
Know a friend who would love reading all the relationship goodness we’ve packed in here? Go ahead and share it with them!