April 08, 2022
top trending topics
💍 Make your future marriage the focus of your engagement season.
👥 Having friends is a good thing, but how they impact your relationship matters.
🛡️ Want a glimpse at healthy trust in marriage? Look no further!
👫 Get on the same page with your fiancé when it comes to having opposite-sex friendships.
💛 Voice & set your expectations before your marriage starts.
tips & tricks for growth
be in the here and now when you’re talking to friends & family
Want to be successful and valued at work and at home—really anywhere? Be present with who you are with and who you are talking to. I know you’re gonna say, “But I am present—I’m standing right next to them!” That’s the easy part of being present. The hard part is being mentally present.
It’s impossible to be mentally present with someone when we are full of our own thoughts. Our minds are usually rethinking the past or wondering about the future.
Here are a few things to be mindful of when talking to someone:
Choosing to block out distractions, choosing to empty my mind of clutter, choosing to focus on the speaker, and choosing to let them know they are heard.
🗣️ Body Language.
Your body is sending signals about how engaged you are and even how much you care about what is being said.
🗣️ WAIT (Why Am I Talking?)
Listen for the right time to ask questions or take your turn speaking.
Multitasking causes us to miss so many moments.
This is really the foundation of being present with people and in the moment with them.
Practice a few of these tips to be more present with your kids, friends, family, etc., and see the difference it makes. You can do it!
you don’t have to dread having difficult convos
If you create distance because one of you or both of you are pushing away your feelings, rather than pushing through them, then you create an opportunity to have that gap filled by things that only make matters worse.
Disappointment, resentment or misunderstandings start filling the gap and then you two have enough tension to fill a guest room that you don’t have.
You can’t fix a problem you don’t know is there and neither can your fiancé. Neither of you is a mind reader. Conflict isn’t comfortable—I won’t sell it to you like it is. But I will be honest—it’s often a chance for growth and a better understanding of each other.
You aren’t going to be doing life on your own anymore. Important decisions are made together. I mean, as the saying goes, “Two heads are better than one.”
Listen with the intention to hear each other and respond—not just make a rebuttal (as tempting as that can be.)
what we’re lovin’
This week’s picks come from James Woods, #newlywed & Husband to Marquita, Dad of 6, and the Community Outreach Specialist here at First Things First. Take a peek at his recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOOD. Check ’em out 👀:
🎶 The Soul and R&B playlists on YouTube Music are great for me and my wife because music soothes the soul! Great for conversations and even playing a little music trivia with you fiancé- have fun with it!
👩❤️💋👨 This awesome Random Date Night website is filled with new and interesting ideas for the couple who is having trouble finding fun and new things to do together. I honestly wish I had found out about this website earlier!
😂 These #EngagementRelated tweets are sure to give you a laugh! As a newlywed, my wife and I can still relate to some of them! We are silly sometimes and we love these as well as TikTok, but if you have a sense of humor like we do, then this is a must!
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