We hear a lot of talk about how to keep our heart healthy. Eat right, exercise, take one aspirin a day, eat foods low in cholesterol, get plenty of rest and the list goes on. Just as we have information to help us keep our heart healthy, there are also certain things that we know about relationships that keep them “heart healthy.”
Today, people are so busy with work, children, extra curricular activities and who knows what else, that family members are like ships passing in the night. Our relationships pay the price for such a busy lifestyle.
In order to build healthy relationships one has to be intentional and committed.
Heart healthy relationships have certain characteristics, which include:
Humor – Humor when used appropriately can help defuse a potentially volatile situation. It has been said that laughter is good for the soul. It is also good for relationships. Expectations that are appropriate – In today’s culture many people have unrealistic expectations of their mate and their children. Pushing children to excel, stressful jobs, competitive sports and life in general contribute to the problem. Learning to keep things in perspective and asking the question, what is important in the long run? The answer to that question can help shed light on what really matters in your life. Most would agree that the relationship between child and parent or spouse is much more important than straight A’s or a spotless house.
Appreciate – Sometimes people get so involved in “doing” life that they forget to appreciate the people they care about the most. When is the last time you sent a card to a friend for no reason or told your spouse you appreciate him/her for all he/she does for your marriage and family without adding “I only wish…” Have you ever told your child you are honored to be their parent?
Respect - Experts suggest that you never second-guess your spouse in front of the children or anyone else. If you want your children to learn how to treat others with respect you must model it for them. That means talking to each other appropriately and not talking bad about your spouse to a third party. Try asking yourself, – “Is what I am about to do or say going to build up this person or tear them down?”
Time – How do you spend your time? If you knew you didn’t have much time left on this earth would you immediately start spending your time differently? If the answer to that question is yes, now may be a good time for you to examine your priorities. Heart healthy relationships happen when people spend time together connecting on a consistent basis.
There’s a line in a song that Garth Brooks sang that says, “If tomorrow never comes, will she know how much I love her?” Does your spouse know how much you love him/her? Do your children know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you love them – not the grades they bring home? If you have relationships that are not where they need to be, take advantage of today and do something different. Having heart healthy relationships is about loving the people that are in your world, your mate, elderly neighbor, your children, parents, etc. Be intentional. Pick one of these and start putting it into practice with the ones you love today. When you put your head down on the pillow to go to sleep tonight, your heart will probably feel better because you did.
Copyright ©2010 First Things First
