I was recently asked why kids lie. My answer: “Because we teach them to,” after which I was called a liar. Point withstanding, we unintentionally teach our kids how to lie. We start off by telling our impressionable kids to tell grandma that her Chinese food is better than take out, or that their sister’s dance recital was the best thing ever. Soon enough we allow them to tell friends they can’t come out and play because they have homework to do, when the truth is they don’t want to play with them or that you as parents don’t want your kids playing with those bad influences from down the street. With proper training, any kid can be taught to lie.
Children are imprinted by their parents and influenced by their society (friends, family, and school), and they also mimic culture. So if you’re struggling with your child’s behavior, look first at yourself. Then check out their friends and family, and then finally the TV shows they are watching, the music they listen to or the things they are reading. Chances are you’ll discover the catalyst to your troubles. For example, every time our daughter’s friend visits and tells a fib, we get a dose of it at home. Any time a steady dose of ‘teen-rated’ games get played on the PS3, eventually “sister torture” will follow, courtesy of our son. It’s been like clockwork in our home. With that said, we as parents need to be more mindful of the examples we present to our children. And if imitation truly is the sincerest form of flattery, let’s give them something great to imitate.
